“I’m Afraid to Say His Name….”

Although the writing from Ms. Edwards is specifically about a child, I often hear this same sentiment, no matter what the positional relationship might be with the loved one. I have no idea just how many times I have heard one of our bereaved explain how it seems everyone in their life has forgotten their loved one, because no one mentions his name anymore. I have reminded many of them it may not be their loved one has been forgotten at all, but it is more likely those around them try not to say his name, because they are afraid they will “upset” them. Even though I do what I do for a living and should know better, I still have the same anxiety when it comes to those in my personal life. I try to be intentional about overcoming the anxiety and speaking the name, but it takes the intentional effort.
So, if you have noticed a tendency by those around you not to use your loved one’s name, then why don’t you be more intentional about bringing his name up in a conversation, and see how others respond? Every situation is unique, but in many cases, you will see a look of relief on the faces of others when they realize it is “okay” to talk about him in front of you.

Copyright © 2014 by Kim Smith.