Upcoming Seminar on Monday, May 11: “What Makes My Grief Journey Unique?”

This seminar has been designed to give an overview of some of the basic factors which make each person’s grief experience unique to him or her, such as his relationship with the person who died or her own personality. You may have heard the phrase: “I know how you feel.” Yet, no one can truly know how you feel, because your journey is unique to you. Understanding the factors which affect your journey may help you navigate.

When?—May 11 from 6pm-7pm

Where?--LCCU Conference Room (#140) Louisiana Central Credit Union Building at 824 Elmwood Park Blvd.

No registration required, but for more information, please contact Kim at (504) 734-0140 or ksmith@stjosephhospice.com.

Mother’s Day Edition: “How Am I Going to ‘Get Through’ Mother’s Day This Year?” (2015 Posting)

Mother’s Day is a special day in American culture...a day set aside to honor our mothers and/or those who have filled that mother-role in our lives. Traditionally, this is a day of celebration, but for many each year, the day is one more reminder that our earthly mothers are no longer with us.

Just like the other “special” days in the calendar year, I strongly suggest that you make a plan for how you will spend this Mother’s Day. The following ideas are just a few of many found in Harold Ivan Smith’s Grieving the Death of a Mother (Note: These ideas could also be adapted & used for other “special” days.)

– Donate to a worthy cause in honor of your mother (i.e., If your mother was a teacher, you might choose to establish a scholarship for someone pursuing a teaching degree.)

– Do a mitzvah, or good deed, in honor of your mother (i.e., Buy or make something from scratch and give to someone who would appreciate it.)

– Write a poem or a song about your mother. Consider using this sentence to get you started: “I never realized that my mother could…”

– Refinish a piece of your mother’s furniture (Either for you or to give as a gift to someone dear to your mother.)

– Become a companion to someone who is also experiencing motherloss. (You may feel as though you are the only one going through this kind of pain, but I can assure you, there are many who can relate and wouldappreciate a companion on their grief journey.)

– Cook your mother’s favorite recipes. Make copies of the recipes or even put together a recipe book, so that the recipes can be passed on to future generations.

I hope these suggestions have been helpful, but if you feel that you or someone you care about needs additional support, has questions about what he/she is experiencing, or would like information about services available to him/her, please don’t hesitate to call me at (504) 734-0140 or e-mail me at ksmith@stjosephhospice.com.

“Grief Is the Price of Love”

I ran across this little poem last week, and each of the phrases captured my attention in a different way. I would like each of you to do as I am doing right now. I am going to type each section of the poem, and I am going to ask questions for you to answer under each. You can either answer the question to yourself or choose to share your answer with others by posting your answers in the comments below this blog post.

I. “Grief never ends, but it changes.”

• Do you agree with the phrase, “grief never ends”? Why or why not?
• How has your grief journey changed from day 1 til now? How have you changed? 

II. “It’s a passage, not a place to stay.”

• How is the grief a journey and not a destination?

III. “The sense of loss must give way if we are to value the life that was lived.”

• Do you believe this to be true? If so, where are you in the process of seeing “the sense of loss” give way to a fuller focus on your loved one’s life?

IV. “Grief is not a sign of weakness.”

• I want to change that phrase just a bit to clarify what I believe the author was truly attempting convey—The outward expression of grief, known as mourning, is not a sign of weakness. However, many in our American culture may disagree. Do you believe an outward expression of grief is a sign of some form of weakness? Whether “yes” or “no,” please explain your position?

V. Grief, “It is the price of love.”

• Grief has been described in many ways, but this is one especially thought-provoking perspective. How could grief be considered “the price of love”? How would that “price” be different for each griever and with each grief experience?

Copyright © 2015 by Kim Smith

June 2015 Memorial Service

Later this week, we will be mailing our invitations for the June 2015 Memorial Service which will include those loved ones who died on St. Joseph Hospice from October 1, 2014 through March 31, 2015. If by Monday, April 27, you have yet to receive your invitation, please send me (Kim) an e-mail at ksmith@stjosephhospice.com and I will resend it either via e-mail or postal mail—your choice. We would love to see you and your loved ones in attendance as we celebrate the lives of those we have been honored to care for recently.

To What “New and Deeper Appreciations” Have You Been Awakened?

I ran across this graphic earlier today, and thought it might be helpful to those who read this blog. By now, you have more than likely become aware or have increased awareness as a result of your grief. Many times over the years, our group participants have taken some time to reflect and answer: “What are some of the lessons you have learned during your grief journey?” I ask that now of you, as well as this question: “How has your grief journey changed you?” Also, “to what ‘new and deeper appreciations’ have you been awakened?”

Your Added Verse(s) to “I Will Remember You” by Amy Grant?

Though the Amy Grant song “I Will Remember You” was specifically written about a lost romantic love, as you can see from these lyrics, it can be applicable to all types of love.

“I will be walking one day
Down a street far away
And see a face in the crowd and smile
Knowing how you made me laugh
Hearing sweet echoes of you from the past
I will remember you” (From http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/amygrant/iwillrememberyou.html)

As I’m typing this post, I began to wonder, “What verses would I add to this song, if I were writing about someone I am missing?” Remember, you don’t have to worry about making the sentiments rhyme, just say what is on your heart and mind. Here is a small template to get you started:

I will be ____________ one day

__________________________

And see/hear/smell _____________________ and smile/cry/laugh/scream

Know how you _______________________

Hearing ____________________________ from the past

I will remember you

If you do take the challenge and write your own verse(s), I would love to read them if that would be okay. You could either write them in the comments for all to see or you could send them to me via e-mail at ksmith@stjosephhospice.com.

 

"I Am New to This Blog"

We would like to extend a St. Joseph Hospice welcome to those whose loved ones were cared for by the former River Region Hospice. As of February 9, the two businesses came together as one. Letters were mailed yesterday to as many caregivers as we were able to find addresses on, and you may have received one of those letters, and today may be your first look at our bereavement blog. If that is the case, please click on the graphic to learn more. 

Link to "Grief At The Holidays: 12 Ways To Cope With Losing A Loved One This Easter And Passover" Article By Kate Bratskier

"Grief At The Holidays: 12 Ways To Cope With Losing A Loved One This Easter And Passover" By  Kate Bratskier

Social Events on Wednesday, April 15, 2015

• “Heart2Heart Connections” for Widows – Wednesday, April 15, 2015, from 10am-11:30am at 824 Elmwood Park Blvd., NOLA, LCCU Conference Room #140
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• “Coffee & Handshakes” for Widowers – Wednesday, April 15, 2015, from 10am-11:30am at 824 Elmwood Park Blvd., Ste 145, NOLA, St. Joseph Bereavement Office