Monday, March 2, 2015

When There Are Unresolved Issues: “What I Wish I’d Said” or “What I Wish I Hadn’t Said”

A few years ago, country group Rascal Flatts recorded a song entitled, “What Hurts the Most.” Although these lyrics were written about a relationship in which one of the parties walks away from the relationship intentionally, I see how these lyrics might also be applied to the death of a loved one, especially the death of someone with whom you have unresolved issues. Here are the lyrics from the chorus:

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do
(Accessed online at http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/rascalflatts/whathurtsthemost.html)

The writer goes on to say:

But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken.

How about you? Are you battling with regrets of “what I wish I’d said” or “what I wish I hadn’t said”? From my professional experience, regrets can be one of the biggest hurdles when one is walking through the grief journey. If you are struggling with “what I wish I’d said” or “what I wish I had’t said” thoughts, and you just don’t seem to be able to let those thoughts go, don’t hesitate to e-mail me (ksmith@stjosephhospice.com) or call me (504-734-0140) for an appointment so that we can further discuss this issue.

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